I'm Sorry...

I'm sorry mom if I haven't talked to you on the phone but it's just that I'm really hurting nowadays of what I've learned a few days back. I just felt so helpless for what's going on right now. Is it the measurement of being a good daughter for you is through the ability of your children to provide the things we need? I know I still haven't reached that point yet, but it doesn't necessarily mean that I don't have dreams at all. If you only knew what I went through these past years and how I handled all the bad things that happened to me all by myself, with no one to talk to.

And all I can do during those times was to cry at night. I'm still in the process of healing right now for all the hardships I went through, and I'm having a hard time in bringing back the confidence I have for myself. I just don't want to be hurt "ma" and I'm so tired already. I don't know if when will be time wherein I can say that I'm very much happy already and I do have a peace of mind as well. But, I still have to be strong for my child and she's my life, my everything. I know God sees what's inside my heart and the pain that I'm going through that I just keep to myself for the longest time now. He's just the only one who understands me since in this world, there's no one that I can turn to, even someone in the family.