I'm just so happy that I have met you. The month of May is just a very memorable month for me, for the reason that I have talked to you again after 17 yrs. I never thought that my classmate in grade school would mean so much to me now. This is really the perfect time to enter again in a new relationship, after being single for years now.
At that particular moment, I prayed to God that I'll finally meet a person to whom I'll share my life with, and then He gave you to me. You really are an answered prayer. I love you so much sweetheart and I just can't afford to lose you. Thanks for everything. I hope and pray that you are the one already. I want to grow old with you. Yes, I want to marry you after a year, as what you've always asking from me. I really really love you "marvzzzz". I just can't wait to see you soon....
Showing posts with label Random thoughts. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Random thoughts. Show all posts
Monday, July 16, 2012
I'm doing Fine...
It has been months that I have written my last entry in here, 4 months to be exact. I almost have forgotten that this blog do exist, LMAO..
Well anyway, a lot of things happened the past months. Right after I wrote my last entry about losing my job, a few days later I landed a job in one of the most famous freelancing sites online. Yes God is just so great, He immediately revealed to me the kind of thing that I'll be doing, that is way better than my previous job. I'm just so thankful at that time since it really helped us pay our bills and the pay is way better than any regular day jobs out there. The pay is even better than my previous job. But unfortunately, my contracts ended already, and I'm currently struggling in finding another jobs on that site. Well, I have to remain positive and I know anytime soon God will provide jobs since He knows I badly need it right now, coz my daughter is in school already. God Please do help me....
Well anyway, a lot of things happened the past months. Right after I wrote my last entry about losing my job, a few days later I landed a job in one of the most famous freelancing sites online. Yes God is just so great, He immediately revealed to me the kind of thing that I'll be doing, that is way better than my previous job. I'm just so thankful at that time since it really helped us pay our bills and the pay is way better than any regular day jobs out there. The pay is even better than my previous job. But unfortunately, my contracts ended already, and I'm currently struggling in finding another jobs on that site. Well, I have to remain positive and I know anytime soon God will provide jobs since He knows I badly need it right now, coz my daughter is in school already. God Please do help me....
Wednesday, March 21, 2012
I'm just so sad today since I failed for the second time.
I'm just so sad today when I saw one of the statuses of my co-worker. She is just so happy since she's already an IC. And after I read that, I just felt if I worked hard would I'd be able to reach that one as well. For the second time I failed. Maybe there's something wrong with me. I just felt that I'm not really good or smart enough. Looking back, I know that I have mistakes and my heart wasn't really into it. I'm not really focused on my work. So, look at what happened. I do have regrets again. For the second time I missed the opportunity that was given to me. This particular thing is definitely an eye-opener for me. I should change my attitudes towards work.
At this very moment, all I just want to say to myself is " for heaven sake, you need to work very hard now since in a few months time, your daughter will be going to school already! How would you be able to sustain her needs, and how would you be able to give her a brighter future if you're always like that!"
Lord please do help me as well since I don't have the enough courage and strength to face all the hardships in life, like the challenges at work. Please give me the enough strength that I needed.
Lord, please," parang di ko na kaya 'to". Please reveal the things that I should need to do in order for me to have that "day job" that I badly need at this very moment. And most of all, forgive me if I fail the second time around since I have mistakes as well. I didn't give importance to the opportunities that were given to me. But I need to move on now, and I should not dwell on the negative things that happened to me. But rather focus on finding another one and to correct all the mistakes that I've done. I'm very determined now. I hope You'll give me another chance and help me to do my job well.
At this very moment, all I just want to say to myself is " for heaven sake, you need to work very hard now since in a few months time, your daughter will be going to school already! How would you be able to sustain her needs, and how would you be able to give her a brighter future if you're always like that!"
Lord please do help me as well since I don't have the enough courage and strength to face all the hardships in life, like the challenges at work. Please give me the enough strength that I needed.
Lord, please," parang di ko na kaya 'to". Please reveal the things that I should need to do in order for me to have that "day job" that I badly need at this very moment. And most of all, forgive me if I fail the second time around since I have mistakes as well. I didn't give importance to the opportunities that were given to me. But I need to move on now, and I should not dwell on the negative things that happened to me. But rather focus on finding another one and to correct all the mistakes that I've done. I'm very determined now. I hope You'll give me another chance and help me to do my job well.
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
I don't like people who belittle me
I don't like people who belittle me. And it's just so sad that the people who belittled you, is your family. Yes, it hurts so much. Right now, I don't know what to do since I just felt that I'm so helpless, so little and so disappointed with myself. I really don't know what's in store for me and if there's still a brighter future ahead of me. I just felt that every thing I do doesn't work at all. It seemed that it takes forever for me to receive the positive results of my hard work. And it hurts more when people closest to you are also the ones who would contribute to your loneliness and would make you feel that you're such a failure.
I don't like people who will control your life as if they know better than you, and you should listen to them since they are thinking that you are not capable of making decisions for yourself. They will not just ask about your ideas or suggestions or what you really felt at the moment. They are just so insensitive and so self-centered.
I really don't like people who are like this, but as what we always say, we can't really please everybody or you can't force everyone to like you.
I don't like people who will control your life as if they know better than you, and you should listen to them since they are thinking that you are not capable of making decisions for yourself. They will not just ask about your ideas or suggestions or what you really felt at the moment. They are just so insensitive and so self-centered.
I really don't like people who are like this, but as what we always say, we can't really please everybody or you can't force everyone to like you.
Sunday, April 24, 2011
I hope you understand me....
I just want to express here what I really felt at the moment. I was talking to my mother over the phone yesterday, and after that conversation, I felt so little. I got hurt not because she scolded me and the like, but as a matter of fact it was just the typical conversation we had every time she called us up. The conversation ended well, however, after we talked I just felt so helpless and discouraged with myself.
I love my mother so much, I owe every thing to her. If not because of her I won't be the person I am now. She is both the mother and the father at the same time. However, all I want is that she will be more sensitive and careful about the words she uttered since even if she never intentioned to hurt me, but the words or comments she used kind of belittled me. There were times as well that she did that and all I want to do is to cry out loud. I don't compete with anyone, even though she don't see my efforts I'm really working hard for my future and most especially for my baby, God knows every thing what's truly in my heart. I don't want to rush things that's why I'm doing things one day at a time.
She has the tendency to control my life and she really wants that I'll be the one to fulfill all her dreams for herself and for our family. I'm very much willing to do every thing I can just to improve our living and to give the things that I believe she would be very happy to have.It's just that, I want her to be realistic, since if you want a particular thing, you can't have that at a certain age, even if you already told yourself, "at the age of 30 I want to achieve this or that or I want to have this or that" since you don't have control of what's going to happen in the future. Yes, I really understand that it really needs a lot of hard work and luck as well, of course with the guidance and the help of God.
All I want is that she would be sensitive on what I actually feel, and let me live my life the way I want. I'm not a bad person, I don't even go out with my friends, and most of the time, I'm just at home. I already considered myself a responsible person. I had corrected the wrong things I've done in the past and because of those things, I became a better person. I'm doing and practicing the things what I believe what's right not just in the eyes of people but most importantly, in the eyes of God.
All I want is that she would just guide me and not totally make a decision for me. "Just let me live my life and let me decide for myself, what career path I should take, and let me achieve my dreams the way I want it. " I want to say it with conviction, I know what are my duties and responsibilities in life, for you, for my family, and for my daughter. Just don't take away my dream to be with my daughter and see her grow. She's my life, my every thing. I don't want to work abroad, since all I want is to try my luck here, no matter how hard it is, as long as I'm with my daughter, that's the most important thing for me. I want to take care of her and be with her when she's going through something. I want her to feel my love. And I can't do these things when I'm far away from her. Please stop insisting that I should work abroad since you believe that the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. "
"Mom, you're a great mother, I understand that all you want is the best for us. But always remember that we're not kids anymore. We already know how to make decisions for ourselves, and please don't take that away from us.You have to always ask us what we want to do with our lives and the things we want to do. All you have to do is to give us advices, and make us feel that whenever we fell and made bad decisions in life, you are always there to welcome us with open arms. Please LET US MAKE DECISIONS FOR OURSELVES SO THAT WE WILL GROW AS A PERSON, AND PLEASE DON'T COMPARE US WITH OTHER PEOPLE, WITH THEIR ACHIEVEMENTS, SINCE YOU JUST MAKE US FEEL HOW LITTLE WE ARE. I hope you understand me."
I love my mother so much, I owe every thing to her. If not because of her I won't be the person I am now. She is both the mother and the father at the same time. However, all I want is that she will be more sensitive and careful about the words she uttered since even if she never intentioned to hurt me, but the words or comments she used kind of belittled me. There were times as well that she did that and all I want to do is to cry out loud. I don't compete with anyone, even though she don't see my efforts I'm really working hard for my future and most especially for my baby, God knows every thing what's truly in my heart. I don't want to rush things that's why I'm doing things one day at a time.
She has the tendency to control my life and she really wants that I'll be the one to fulfill all her dreams for herself and for our family. I'm very much willing to do every thing I can just to improve our living and to give the things that I believe she would be very happy to have.It's just that, I want her to be realistic, since if you want a particular thing, you can't have that at a certain age, even if you already told yourself, "at the age of 30 I want to achieve this or that or I want to have this or that" since you don't have control of what's going to happen in the future. Yes, I really understand that it really needs a lot of hard work and luck as well, of course with the guidance and the help of God.
All I want is that she would be sensitive on what I actually feel, and let me live my life the way I want. I'm not a bad person, I don't even go out with my friends, and most of the time, I'm just at home. I already considered myself a responsible person. I had corrected the wrong things I've done in the past and because of those things, I became a better person. I'm doing and practicing the things what I believe what's right not just in the eyes of people but most importantly, in the eyes of God.
All I want is that she would just guide me and not totally make a decision for me. "Just let me live my life and let me decide for myself, what career path I should take, and let me achieve my dreams the way I want it. " I want to say it with conviction, I know what are my duties and responsibilities in life, for you, for my family, and for my daughter. Just don't take away my dream to be with my daughter and see her grow. She's my life, my every thing. I don't want to work abroad, since all I want is to try my luck here, no matter how hard it is, as long as I'm with my daughter, that's the most important thing for me. I want to take care of her and be with her when she's going through something. I want her to feel my love. And I can't do these things when I'm far away from her. Please stop insisting that I should work abroad since you believe that the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence. "
"Mom, you're a great mother, I understand that all you want is the best for us. But always remember that we're not kids anymore. We already know how to make decisions for ourselves, and please don't take that away from us.You have to always ask us what we want to do with our lives and the things we want to do. All you have to do is to give us advices, and make us feel that whenever we fell and made bad decisions in life, you are always there to welcome us with open arms. Please LET US MAKE DECISIONS FOR OURSELVES SO THAT WE WILL GROW AS A PERSON, AND PLEASE DON'T COMPARE US WITH OTHER PEOPLE, WITH THEIR ACHIEVEMENTS, SINCE YOU JUST MAKE US FEEL HOW LITTLE WE ARE. I hope you understand me."
Friday, April 15, 2011
Missed this blog..
The last time I wrote an entry here was a couple of days ago, and I must say, I missed this blog. It always took me a couple of days before I could write again another entry here because as what I've always said, I'm just too busy with work, and other things both online and offline. Well, anyway, I'm just happy since I bought another domain name for my other blog. So, all in all, I have 3 domain names already, and this one is the only blog that is still a blogspot. This blog will remain a blogspot since most of the entries here are too personal, wherein I have no plans of sharing it with other people.
However, I understand that there are a few people that could still read some of my entries here since this blog is visible to public, like people who searched some keywords on search engines and land on my blog, that is of course beyond my control.
Nevertheless, I don't mind if there are still a few people who could read what I've written here, since as far as I know, even if some of my entries here were too personal, I believe that there's no reason for me at all to worry if they have read my rantings in here. But for now, I still don't want to promote this blog to other bloggers, maybe I'll changed my mind once this blog has a higher page rank already.*Lol* I hope this thing would really happen so that I could really make the most of this blog, which is to speak my heart out, and monetizing it at the same time.*Lol.
However, I understand that there are a few people that could still read some of my entries here since this blog is visible to public, like people who searched some keywords on search engines and land on my blog, that is of course beyond my control.
Nevertheless, I don't mind if there are still a few people who could read what I've written here, since as far as I know, even if some of my entries here were too personal, I believe that there's no reason for me at all to worry if they have read my rantings in here. But for now, I still don't want to promote this blog to other bloggers, maybe I'll changed my mind once this blog has a higher page rank already.*Lol* I hope this thing would really happen so that I could really make the most of this blog, which is to speak my heart out, and monetizing it at the same time.*Lol.
Sunday, February 20, 2011
What path should I take..
The result of the December 2010 Nursing Licensure examination was released this month and I congratulate the newly-registered nurses who passed and it’s great to know that your hard work paid-off. I have a friend who passed and I’m just so happy for her. She truly deserves it since she’s working so hard just to be where she is right now. I’ve witnessed how she worked hard, her sleepless nights really paid off. She is also very excited to find job since being a registered nurse was really her dream ever since and for her to land a job in a hospital as well. I am just so glad she made it along with thousands of passers.
I am also a registered nurse myself and passed the nursing licensure exam almost 3 years ago. At that time, I’m very excited to practice my profession and I was very happy the moment I knew that I did pass. But after 3 long years, things have changed. I went through a lot and I just realized that this profession was not really for me. That’s why now I’m looking for new opportunities and I’m also planning to go back to school or something, but for now I'll still have to think a lot of times if what things to pursue.
I am also a registered nurse myself and passed the nursing licensure exam almost 3 years ago. At that time, I’m very excited to practice my profession and I was very happy the moment I knew that I did pass. But after 3 long years, things have changed. I went through a lot and I just realized that this profession was not really for me. That’s why now I’m looking for new opportunities and I’m also planning to go back to school or something, but for now I'll still have to think a lot of times if what things to pursue.
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