I'm just so sad today since I failed for the second time.

I'm just so sad today when I saw one of the statuses of my co-worker. She is just so happy since she's already an IC. And after I read that, I just felt if I worked hard would I'd be able to reach that one as well. For the second time I failed. Maybe there's something wrong with me. I just felt that I'm not really good or smart enough. Looking back, I know that I have mistakes and my heart wasn't really into it. I'm not really focused on my work. So, look at what happened. I do have regrets again. For the second time I missed the opportunity that was given to me. This particular thing is definitely an eye-opener for me. I should change my attitudes towards work.

At this very moment, all I just want to say to myself is " for heaven sake, you need to work very hard now since in a few months time, your daughter will be going to school already! How would you be able to sustain her needs, and how would you be able to give her a brighter future if you're always like that!"

Lord please do help me as well since I don't have the enough courage and strength to face all the hardships in life, like the challenges at work. Please give me the enough strength that I needed.

Lord, please," parang di ko na kaya 'to". Please reveal the things that I should need to do in order for me to have that "day job" that I badly need at this very moment. And most of all, forgive me if I fail the second time around since I have mistakes as well. I didn't give importance to the opportunities that were given to me. But I need to move on now, and I should not dwell on the negative things that happened to me. But rather focus on finding another one and to correct all the mistakes that I've done. I'm very determined now. I hope You'll give me another chance and help me to do my job well.